Sunday, July 09, 2006

i can't believe someone invented this fucking thing

You know that guy that's always "trying to help?" The one standing in close proximity when you lose your job, find out your car is stolen or that your girlfriend really has been fucking the entire state football team? The guy who pats you reassuringly on the shoulder and says" Man, it's gonna be ok" or even worse, tries to crack a joke? The guy that, were you not utterly distracted with the current disarray of your life, you just might punch square in the fucking face? This guy has a fix all for everything. Which brings me to my current point-that guy was clearly involved in this creation of this amazing item.

What is it? It's called "Voice changing software." Ok, why is she upset, the reader is thinking-perhaps you are remembering the goodness of an old toy that could transform your speaking voice into the menacing voice of Darth Vader when you were a wee lad. I thought that toy rocked the house myself, but what we have here is not even worth comparison. It's specifically aimed at the female gamer-wow, that's rare and awesome-how much of this industry targets that demographic? However, upon reading further we find that the voice changer is specifically designed for female gamers using voice software in MMORPG's. It's purpose?

TO DISGUISE THAT YOU ARE A WOMAN BY CHANGING YOUR VOICE.

So apparently audio4fun.com is the seller of this product, and upon further examination of their website I found that the software itself is not aimed at women. It seems that other writers thought immediately of the apparent problem that men just don't like to hear the female voice online when they're trying to launch that 30 man raid. It just threatens their sense of masculinity. What are women doing in this universe, anyway? You can't possibly be useful in this rough enviroment.

News, boys-not only can we be useful, but quite often, we can wipe the floor with you. A voicechanger is not going to make any difference there, beyond the idea that it may save your eggshell-fragile male ego. Women are playing and playing well. This product offends me-not because it exists, but because people are portraying it as a solution to the problem of being female in a male dominated society. Personally, I wouldn't be caught dead using this-on the contrary, I want my voice heard exactly for what it is, and if boys don't like playing with a girl, there's a lot of other servers to go explore. Surely if go on a PvP server, you won't have to deal with this problem. That guy that just wiped the floor with you before you could blink is definately a guy.....right?

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